Debates on online forums can be enriching and if done with an open mind can broaden our horizons on different topics.
However here are five things we tend to do wrong,
1) Some people go to the extent of spoiling their relationships with friends over Facebook debates and disagreements. Remember, whatever relationship you may have with anyone in your friend’s list is more important that any debate or ideological difference in the world. This is just a forum for sharing thoughts and ideas and not a matter of life and death. We can choose to debate hard if we like to, but then we need to be mature enough to forget about it without unnecessarily bringing in our egos and the anger of a real or perceived sense of loss over a subject or a debate. Think of the good times spent, the help and support given and taken from the person in question and then decide what is more important.
2) Please debate hard, but do not get personal. What I have noticed unfortunately is that in some cases, post getting challenged by logic and facts, people tend to get personal and nasty. Even if we disagree over a topic, let us try to be respectful of others and agree to disagree sometimes. The world is beautiful because there are different people with different moral, ideological, artistic and social stands. It would be extremely boring if everyone thought exactly the same! For me, at times I have seen people rant angrily on their walls after a heated debate which is extremely amusing. Others start calling me intellectual, commie, artist, singer, story writer with a “pseudo” in front of any of these words. This word being the epitome of banality these days. :)
3) Understand that over a given topic, what matters is ONLY one’s knowledge and understanding on the topic and the capability to put these forward. If anyone comes into a debate with the baggage or the belligerence of his/her age, social standing, education, position in the corporate world, possessions, geographical location or anything else like that, it does not make for a constructive discussion. We tend to get more aggressive when we realize that someone we thought does not stand a chance against us, is beating us hands down with logic over a debate. :)
4) We cannot have substantial knowledge over a topic suddenly and if we try to muscle through a discussion without logic or facts, wanting to be “wannabe experts” overnight, we end up making fools of ourselves. I can speak for myself. There are my areas of passion, over which I have spent countless hours since childhood and still read about them extensively. I love to write on these topics and share my views. But I do not speak on areas where I believe I do not have enough knowledge. If interested, I try to listen, accept superior logic, read and understand first before speaking. Over the years this makes us competent to speak and share our views on many areas without looking half-baked or juvenile.
5) We all have the urge to respond to things on social forums, that do not conform to our line of thought, which is perfectly fine. However we should do a bit of thinking and reading if possible, before replying. Let us appreciate that the poster might have also given the topic lots of thought before penning down his/her thoughts, especially if these are original thoughts. The debate becomes interesting when both people involved have a similar level of understanding. This is however not mandatory, people have the right to just reply with whatever they want to. But again, one should be ready for a logical rebuttal as well and have the maturity to accept the same and not make it a matter of bruised egos if the counter logic is superior and makes more sense.
Research shows that behaviour on social forums show who we are actually. How we behave when we have the luxury of the keyboard, can hide behind the internet and do not have to face the person directly. This takes the mask off and brings out a lot of our strengths, values, hidden complexes and insecurities. Hence over social forums we should discuss exactly like we would do in person. We may underestimate its importance, but today behaviour over social forums forms an important component of our overall social perception, whether we like it or not. People have been fired and recruited over views on Facebook and LinkedIn profiles.
Happy New Year and hope to have lots of constructive and enriching debates with you all.
However here are five things we tend to do wrong,
1) Some people go to the extent of spoiling their relationships with friends over Facebook debates and disagreements. Remember, whatever relationship you may have with anyone in your friend’s list is more important that any debate or ideological difference in the world. This is just a forum for sharing thoughts and ideas and not a matter of life and death. We can choose to debate hard if we like to, but then we need to be mature enough to forget about it without unnecessarily bringing in our egos and the anger of a real or perceived sense of loss over a subject or a debate. Think of the good times spent, the help and support given and taken from the person in question and then decide what is more important.
2) Please debate hard, but do not get personal. What I have noticed unfortunately is that in some cases, post getting challenged by logic and facts, people tend to get personal and nasty. Even if we disagree over a topic, let us try to be respectful of others and agree to disagree sometimes. The world is beautiful because there are different people with different moral, ideological, artistic and social stands. It would be extremely boring if everyone thought exactly the same! For me, at times I have seen people rant angrily on their walls after a heated debate which is extremely amusing. Others start calling me intellectual, commie, artist, singer, story writer with a “pseudo” in front of any of these words. This word being the epitome of banality these days. :)
3) Understand that over a given topic, what matters is ONLY one’s knowledge and understanding on the topic and the capability to put these forward. If anyone comes into a debate with the baggage or the belligerence of his/her age, social standing, education, position in the corporate world, possessions, geographical location or anything else like that, it does not make for a constructive discussion. We tend to get more aggressive when we realize that someone we thought does not stand a chance against us, is beating us hands down with logic over a debate. :)
4) We cannot have substantial knowledge over a topic suddenly and if we try to muscle through a discussion without logic or facts, wanting to be “wannabe experts” overnight, we end up making fools of ourselves. I can speak for myself. There are my areas of passion, over which I have spent countless hours since childhood and still read about them extensively. I love to write on these topics and share my views. But I do not speak on areas where I believe I do not have enough knowledge. If interested, I try to listen, accept superior logic, read and understand first before speaking. Over the years this makes us competent to speak and share our views on many areas without looking half-baked or juvenile.
5) We all have the urge to respond to things on social forums, that do not conform to our line of thought, which is perfectly fine. However we should do a bit of thinking and reading if possible, before replying. Let us appreciate that the poster might have also given the topic lots of thought before penning down his/her thoughts, especially if these are original thoughts. The debate becomes interesting when both people involved have a similar level of understanding. This is however not mandatory, people have the right to just reply with whatever they want to. But again, one should be ready for a logical rebuttal as well and have the maturity to accept the same and not make it a matter of bruised egos if the counter logic is superior and makes more sense.
Research shows that behaviour on social forums show who we are actually. How we behave when we have the luxury of the keyboard, can hide behind the internet and do not have to face the person directly. This takes the mask off and brings out a lot of our strengths, values, hidden complexes and insecurities. Hence over social forums we should discuss exactly like we would do in person. We may underestimate its importance, but today behaviour over social forums forms an important component of our overall social perception, whether we like it or not. People have been fired and recruited over views on Facebook and LinkedIn profiles.
Happy New Year and hope to have lots of constructive and enriching debates with you all.
