The 15 greatest World Cup moments for the Indian cricket fan

The World Cup fever is slowly building up and our cricket crazy nation would be fondly remembering the greatest cricketing moments involving our country. Which are the World Cup moments that still warm the cockles of the hearts of the Indian cricket fans?

The 1983 ICC Cricket World Cup:

Underdogs India winning the World Cup beating Australia, England and West Indies on the way, can be compared to David defeating many Goliaths. Independent India’s greatest sporting success during that time is part of legends now. There were some great moments during this historic turn of events.

1)   Kapil Dev’s blistering 175 – As a kid I remember my father glued to the radio set listening to the news and excitedly narrating how the India captain made 175 not out against Zimbabwe and took India to victory from a precarious 17 for 5. Unfortunately there are no recordings of that innings, probably the best innings ever played in a World Cup, by one of the greatest cricketers. 

2)   India dethrones the West Indies – In the final match, defending a modest 183, there are scenes that would always be shown on TV and would be played again and again on YouTube. Kapil Dev running backwards and taking an excellent catch to dismiss the dangerous Vivian Richards. Mohinder Amarnath, the man of tournament, getting the last wicket of Michael Holding out leg before, pulling off a stump as a souvenir as the team runs towards the pavilion, spectators thronging the players. Then the Indian captain with that innocent smile, with the Cup on the Lord’s balcony, the team behind him. India as a cricketing nation had arrived.

The 1987 Reliance World Cup:

The Indian team led by Kapil Dev again, started the 1987 World Cup campaign at home, hoping to repeat the performance of 1983. India dramatically lost out to Australia by 1 run in the first match, but subsequently put a string of superlative performances winning all the other league games.

The television had made major inroads into Indian households. Graham Gooch of England eventually “swept” India aside in the semi-final clash, but before that in a league match against the New Zealand there were some moments to cherish for the Indian fan.

3)   Chetan Sharma pulls of a hat trick – The Haryana bowler took the first hat trick ever in a World Cup, all three batsmen out bowled. The Kiwis still managed to score 221 batting first, a decent total for those times. 

4)   Gavaskar blasts through to his maiden ODI ton - India scored the required 221 runs in 32 overs at a very brisk rate and the original little master Gavaskar, scored an pretty uncharacteristic stroke filled hundred in style, with 3 sixes and 10 fours. Alongside there was Kris Srikanth who scored a characteristic stroke filled 75. We had a great evening discussing the match with friends and neighbours that day.

The 1992 Cricket World Cup:

The Gavaskar era had come to an end and the Tendulkar era had begun for Indian cricket. The 1992 World Cup in Australia and New Zealand belonged to Martin Crowe of New Zealand and Imran Khan’s Pakistan. India had a forgettable outing, winning only 2 of the 7 league matches. An Indian fan would still remember beating arch rivals Pakistan, the eventual champions.

5)   Young Tendulkar stamps his class - The man of the match in the clash with Pakistan, an 18 year old Tendulkar, scored a matured 50 to take India to 216. Pakistan started their reply well but then India could trigger a batting collapse in the Pakistani middle order to get them out 43 runs short. This match is also famous for the incident involving Kiran More and Pakistani great Javed Miandad where the latter jumped like a monkey imitating the Indian keeper. India did not make it to the semis, a placard during the finals read, “India beat Pakistan, end of the World Cup.”

The 1996 Cricket World Cup:

World Cup 1996 would be remembered for Ranatunga’s unbeaten champion Sri Lankan side and the terror of its openers Jayasuriya and Kaluwitharana. For India, Tendulkar scored heaps of runs and Kumble tumbled many wickets.

Eventually captain Azharuddin’s India lost to the champions in an extremely forgettable semifinal at the Eden Gardens; but there were some great moments for the Indian cricket fans with the defining match being the quarter final clash against Pakistan, in Bangalore.

6)   Ajay Jadeja took Waqar Younis to the cleaners - India batted first, Navjot Sidhu scored 93 and was the man of match. However the way Ajay Jadeja took on arguably the best bowler of the era, Waqar Younis, is part of cricketing folklore.  The middle order batsman whacked Younis to all parts of the Chinnaswamy Stadium during the death overs and India amassed 50 runs in the last 3 overs to finish at 287. 

7)   Venkatesh Prasad vs Aamir Sohail - In reply the Pakistani openers Aamir Sohail and Saeed Anwar started playing as if they would finish off the match in 30 overs or so. After hitting a boundary during a Venkatesh Prasad over, Sohail walked down the pitched and pointed his bat at Prasad threateningly, telling him where he will hit the next ball. The next ball from Prasad took Sohail’s off stump with it and the bowler gave him an abusive send off. No Indian fan worth his salt can even forget this one!

The 1999 Cricket World Cup:

The 1999 World Cup in England saw the beginning of the dominance of Australia as the world champion that was to continue for around a decade. India did not make it to the semi-finals in this edition, but there were some exceptional performances nonetheless.

8)   Tendulkar’s tribute to his father - Tendulkar lost his father before India’s match against Zimbabwe and he flew back to India for the funeral. India lost the match unbelievably by 3 runs, suddenly losing its 3 last wickets in a Henry Olonga over. Tendulkar returned for the next match with Kenya and scored an unbeaten 140. Post scoring the century he looked up at the sky and dedicated the century to his father, one of the most poignant moments of the tournament.

9)   The Prince of Kolkata at his magnificent best - The highlight of the Indian performance in this edition of the world cup was the mammoth 183 scored by Sourav Ganguly in Taunton, against Sri Lanka. The southpaw showed incredible dominance over the Lankan bowlers. To step out and hit respectable fast bowlers for sixes and treating spin great Muthiah Muralitharan like a street bowler needs some attitude. Rahul Dravid also scored brilliant hundreds in this match and the one before against Kenya.

The 2003 Cricket World Cup:

India covered itself in glory in the 2003 World Cup that was jointly hosted by South Africa, Zimbabwe and Kenya. Led by Saurav Ganguly, the team won against all teams they played, except Australia. The road to the final was like a dream with couple of exceptional moments.

10) Ashish Nehra sends shivers down the spine of the English - Against England, India batted first and Tendulkar hooked a memorable six of Caddick on his way to a half century. However the real fireworks happened during the second innings of the match when England batted. Ashish Nehra bowled like a magician and returned with figures 6 for 23. Such was the perfection of his line, length and swing, the entire English batting lineup with names like Trescothik, Knight, Vaughan and Hussain struggled to put wood on leather, that entire Durban evening.

11) Tendulkar derails the Rawalpindi Express - As always, the greatest match for India was reserved against Pakistan. It was touted as the “Sachin vs Shoaib” encounter. However in his very first over, Tendulkar upper cut the express fast bowler for a six and then followed it with two consecutive boundaries. Shoaib was removed from the attack. Sehwag did the same to Waqar Younis couple of overs later. The mighty Indian batting chased down 272 runs in a little more than 45 overs. Tendulkar top scored with 98 and was adjudged man of the match. It was the month of March.

In the final against Australia Captain Ganguly unexpectedly batted second. Ricky Ponting’s invincible team never looked like losing and the captain himself batted us out of the match with a marauding 140. The final would always remain a series of “what ifs” for the Indian supporters. An inform battery of bowlers and arguably the best batting line up of the world, could not stop India from losing the match that mattered the most. 

The 2007 Cricket World Cup:

The 2007 World Cup was completely forgettable for India where we could not clear the league stages and lost out to Bangladesh. There is nothing much to celebrate, except the win against minnows Bermuda with Virender Sehwag scoring a bludgeoning century and India scoring a mammoth  413.

The 2011 Cricket World Cup:

The Indian team had changed a lot under Dhoni and he carried forward the good work done by earlier captains like Ganguly. The tied match with England was the highlight of the league stages; however the greatest moments for India were reserved for the knock out stages when India beat Australia, Pakistan and Sri Lanka within a week to claim the trophy after 28 years.

12) Yuvraj propels India to the Semis – The player of the tournament Yuvraj Singh, was India’s greatest asset in this world cup. In the quarter final against Australia, India was in a spot of bother chasing 260, but Yuvraj scored a brilliant half century with the team in need, ably supported by Suresh Raina.

13) Tendulkar, the Semi Final and India beat Pakistan, yet again! -  It was a week day and the entire office gathered inside the cafeteria to watch to watch the match. When Sehwag hit 5 consecutive boundaries of Umar Gul, it seemed that the ceiling would blow off. Tendulkar scored a dogged 85 and was adjudged the man of the match, but the match was actually won by the bowlers. Pakistan would have chased down India’s modest 260, but for the bowlers who choked the middle order and kept taking important wickets. Zaheer Khan had especially mastered the art of choking out oppositions and was the unsung hero of the tournament.  

14) Gautam Gambhir stands up again in a World Cup final - The final at the Wankhede was a fairy tale that would be permanently etched in the minds of Indian cricket fans. Chasing 274 to lift the cup, India lost Sehwag early and when the master blaster edged Malinga to give a catch to the slips, India plummeted to 23 for 2. It seemed that we would not make it and Tendulkar would finish his outstanding career without a world cup. But then Gambhir, who played the most important innings in the T20 world cup final win for India in 2007, played a pivotal role here as well. He made a gritty 97 with the support of Virat Kohli and then with Dhoni, each run worth its weight in gold.  

15) Mahendra Singh Dhoni and the innings of his life – When Kohli got out, Dhoni promoted himself up the order ahead of Yuvraj, and played an innings that every kid playing anywhere in the country dreams of playing. The World Cup final, India in grave danger and captain cool with his brain made of cucumber, takes India home with a master class 91. No Indian cricket fan can forget that last six. That bat speed and the full swing, the ball disappearing into the stands. Dhoni watching it wide eyed till the very last moment and then rolling the bat in his hands in a gesture of triumph, to be engulfed by an ecstatic Yuvraj who was batting at the other end. Tendulkar running down from the pavilion smiling, followed by the rest of the team. Scenes that can be matched only by Kapil Dev standing with his team at the Lord’s balcony during the English summer of 1983.

Will Dhoni be able to repeat the exceptional feat in 2015 and defend the title with a much younger team? As cricket fans we want more cricketing moments like the ones above and the results would take care of themselves. We would then say, “Will not give it back”.

Is Delhi the beginning of the end of traditional Indian politics?

The BJP did make some political mistakes in Delhi, but these do not explain the landslide win for the Aam Aadmi Party with around 96% of the seats and 54% of vote share. The ruling party at the centre has done exceedingly well in the state assembly elections this year, in continuation to their phenomenal performance in the national elections last year.

Hence the margin of this defeat for the ruling party at the Centre has to be put into perspective.

The people of a nation get the kind of leaders they deserve. Time and again we have elected corrupt and criminal elements as our political leaders, since we have a sizeable percentage of citizens who are corrupt themselves. Many others believe that corruption cannot be done away with.

The approval to this phenomenon gets manifested when we say that it is fine if a politician is corrupt as long as he “works”. The AAP challenged this traditional “political liberty” and claimed that a government can run without corruption. Probably they were able to justify the same during their 49 days stint, so even the skeptical voters in the capital decided to give the party a chance.

Now, if the AAP is able to work and run a government with minimal corruption for the next 5 years, then the same would be expected of the traditional political parties as well.

We have also consistently voted along religious and caste lines and probably this would continue at some level. However a few political parties that projected themselves as the saviours of the minorities and certain castes are down in the dumps. The ones in power need to understand this.

The BJP fought the 2014 general elections on a development agenda and did very well. Fundamentalists within the Hindu community would always vote for the BJP and the ones in the minority communities would probably always vote against the party.

The BJP had stormed into power at the centre, because of sizeable section of voters who have nothing to do with Hindutva, but believed in the idea of development of Narendra Modi and in his ability to deliver.

However this section of voters in Delhi did not like the disproportionate and unbridled personal criticism of Kejriwal. They know that the latter had made political mistakes, but have faith in his intent and honesty.

These voters abhor the utterances of the Hindu hardliners and get frustrated when the Prime Minister keeps quiet. Eventually they rearrange their political affiliations, which are not visible over the social media or news debates, but lead to electoral upsets as seen in Delhi.

Hindu hardliners especially over the social media are doing more damage to the BJP and its image than any of its political rivals. The BJP must take a serious note of this because if the hardliners are not contained, they may dilute the development agenda of Modi and would gradually become the overwhelming face of the party’s reign.

All political parties must realize that the quality of their supporters and their political campaigning has to improve. Some years down the line this may become the basic expectation of the voters and then the parties would not be able to adapt suddenly.

The landslide victory of the AAP is bound to have some national consequences. Regional parties in other states would try to emulate some of the ideas of the young political party. The AAP would eventually go national themselves and we may also have some clones springing up.

Politics is a long term game. India is changing and political parties who realize the changing expectations and mind set of the Indian voter would survive in the long run. If the Congress can go into political insignificance in the capital, then this can happen to any party that takes the voter for granted.

The BJP also needs to do some serious introspections since it is being seen as a better alternative to the Congress, but not necessarily the best when there is a third option. The regional parties that have a stronghold over certain states should be careful and work on their agenda and manifesto.

Traditional Indian politics may be far from over, but in Delhi we saw a beginning towards a cleaner and a more matured political discourse. This needs to continue and a good performance in governance by the AAP is critical, with minimum confrontation with the centre. The BJP should also sincerely work together with the new state government. Voters would keep a hawk eye on both.

The other political parties should also compete with better ideas. Maybe some years down the line we would be able to choose the best in politics and not be forced to choose the least evil.

Why Kejriwal needs to be around

It is clear that the Delhi elections would not be a cake walk for the ruling party at the centre. This would be one of the most closely fought elections in recent times and the entire BJP leadership is putting its weight behind Kiran Bedi and their Delhi unit, to try and ensure a win for the party.

The AAP meanwhile has gained major ground as an alternative. Exit polls indicate that there is a clear possibility that the BJP juggernaut might be halted in the capital.

It would be good if Bedi with her impeccable track record becomes Chief Minister, but it would be better if Arvind Kejriwal gets the top job of Delhi.

The preference is post considering the mistakes that Kejriwal has made in the past. He received criticism when he quit the Chief Minister’s post after 49 days and rightly so. Probably he became too ambitious and thought that he could be Prime Minister and change the nation.

But then he left a chair for which people have bribed and allegedly even killed in the past. A “seasoned politician” would have put the second in command or his wife as the Chief Minister of Delhi and would have still fought the general elections. We would have accepted as we have done in the past.

He promised on his kids that he would not take support from anyone and still took the support of the Congress. A “seasoned politician” would never make such promises.

There is the recent “Hawala at midnight” allegation. The AAP tried to be transparent with its funding, but a shady transaction was not properly audited, which is not ideal. Other political parties however don’t even try to be transparent with their funding.

These are mistakes for which Kejriwal needs to be criticized and from which he must learn. However they also show that he is not a “politician” yet in the negative sense of the word and his intent is positive. If he is able to mix this intent with some patience, practicality and shrewdness, we may have a leader the nation needs desperately.  

Politically neutral friends and “netizens” from Delhi, vouch for the fact that during the 49 days of the AAP rule, corruption did reduce in government offices and there was a visible difference in the daily life of a common man in the city. These are changes that would be difficult to bring about for a traditional political party. The AAP may also have its bad apples in the future, but the idea that at least a state can run with minimal corruption for 5 years, needs to be tested in the country.

Two, the AAP has forced parties like the BJP to change for the better. The fact that the BJP had to bring in someone like Kiran Bedi to counter Kejriwal is a recent example. A section of Indians would vote for the best and not for the least evil on the 7^th of February. This has not happened many times in Indian politics and the trend should continue.

Three, understandably some arrogance has crept into the BJP because of the wins it has achieved over the past few months. The Congress and the Left front are down in the dumps and the AAP needs to rise as a potent opposition that would keep the ruling party on its toes.

This is a necessity in a democracy and an alternate political ideology would lead to a more matured and well-rounded political discourse in the country.

Having said this, Kejriwal and his party also need to improve. If the AAP does win, Kejriwal needs to become more practical and learn the art of political brinksmanship. We all want India to be free of corruption, but he needs to realize that this would take time and would not happen before the fall of summer. In the meantime he cannot keep annoying all other important stakeholders.  

However the criticism that he has received especially at the hands of his political rivals has been disproportionate. We have repeatedly chosen hard core criminals to represent us. In comparison Kejriwal has made political mistakes. We should criticize, but need to have the same yardsticks to judge him and his party.

His methods may seem idiosyncratic sometimes, but he is one among us who was frustrated with the way our country runs. While most of us could not get out of our comfort zones, he took the plunge and is struggling in the Indian political system which is often dismissed as a “gutter". We cannot take this away from him.

We need him around because we may not get another like him. Does he deserve another chance and does Delhi deserve him?

Let’s wait till the 10^th of February.

My take on the Rohtak eve teasing incident

As soon as the video of the “Rohtak sisters” beating up the boys, who were allegedly harassing them, went viral, the media went gaga without an investigation. The Haryana government also announced cash and bravery awards for the girls.  

However the other version that has surfaced now seems to suggest that the two sisters are serial thrashers of boys and this particular issue was a fight over a bus seat that has been paraded as a fight back against eve teasing. Six female witnesses have come forward saying that the girls and not the boys were at fault.

Another video of the girls has surfaced where they are thrashing another boy, who is trying to defend himself. One of the girls claimed that more videos would come out since she has been harassed by 2000 boys and she has beaten up many of them.  Though the Haryana government has now put the awards on hold, we are still in no position to judge the truth because at this point we do not know whom to believe. However both situations are possible. 

This interesting twist in this case urges us Indians to have a more wholesome and objective outlook towards such issues. This also brings some other important issues to the fore, regarding the rights and safety of women in India and the rights of the other stakeholders in such cases, the men. Every right thinking man in India needs to support every protest against crimes against women in every possible forum. However one also needs to separate the genuine cases from the spurious ones.

As a society we are very quick to make heroes and villains out of people without a proper analysis of all the points of view and the available facts. The problem with the laws and especially their execution in our country is that many people who are suffering and really need them, often do not have the means or the courage to use them and they keep suffering, while these laws are often misused by the unscrupulous.

Take the misuse of the NREGA, the domestic gas cylinder and ration subsidies as examples. We all would have come across instances where fairly well off people take the benefit of these subsidies while the poor keep languishing in their poverty. The tax laws are such that the middle class pays through its nose while many extremely wealthy citizens in the business class escape the tax net and get away paying almost nothing.

When it comes to laws for the protection of women, the misuse of these laws critically impact the lives of the innocent men at the receiving end. The alleged eve teasers in the Rohtak case were on their way to join the army and may lose out on this career opportunity. In case the allegations against them are found to be false, who would compensate them?

The Supreme Court had observed that 498A, the anti-dowry law of the Indian Penal Code has been grossly misused by women to harass their husbands and in-laws and this has spoiled the lives of many men and emotionally and financially destroyed their families.  Hence in its judgment this year, the apex court ruled that the police cannot automatically arrest an accused in a dowry case, before judicially examining it. This is a step in the right direction and has been hailed by women rights groups as well. 

This does not mean that women are not suffering in the country. They are, and the numbers are worrying. The question we need to ask is, “Are our laws and enforcement agencies helping the right people and ensuring that innocents are not suffering because of these laws?” If this is not happening, then it beats the entire purpose of having these laws. 

The heinous Nirbhaya and Badaun rape cases have shaken the collective conscience of the nation and everyone is up in arms against the oppression and crimes against women and rightly so. There can be no excuse to dowry harassment, domestic violence, eve teasing and rape and men and women together should speak up against these social evils and they are doing so. 

However the incident in Rohtak brings into limelight certain other instances that could be lesser in number but are important nonetheless. What if a young girl with a misplaced sense of women rights, in an act of hyper activism, starts bashing a  boy in a bus because they had an argument over seats and the girl claims that the boy was eve teasing? The society and the laws have to be capable of distinguishing these incidents and not victimize the boy in such cases. 

This incident below happened with me in Kolkata, which underlines the desperation of immature hyper activism in our society that trivialize the importance of women issues. 

I was travelling in a bus and the journey was around 2 hours long. I was not very well that day and was on cetirizine tablets which cause drowsiness. Hence sitting at a window seat I decided to have a nap and was fast asleep. In my sleep, my head would have rolled over towards the shoulder of a young girl sitting beside me. 
 
Suddenly a man woke me up rudely and asked me what I was doing and accused me of harassing the girl. I said I was not well and hence dozed off. Another lady started shouting that they know all these excuses and I should be beaten up. They asked me to come out and they would show me what being ill meant. Understandably I was shocked and scared. 

Thankfully, the girl turned out to be very polite and matured. She said that I was actually asleep and did not realize that my head was brushing against her shoulders and she does not think I did it deliberately. But for the nice lady, I could have been beaten up for eve teasing that day. I thanked her and heaved a sigh of relief after leaving the bus.
 
The point is that we need to speak against these things, but we also need to be matured and ethical enough while deciding as to what we are terming as “harassment” and “eve teasing”. If a man is teasing a woman, the woman needs to give it back (ensuring that she is safe) and others should not be mere onlookers.

However there could always be a bit of an argument over seats in a bus or a train. If a man speaks impolitely to a woman, the woman can fight back, the other passengers need to reprimand the man and try to moderate the situation. Similarly if a woman is unduly aggressive, others need to tone her down. 

But these incidents should not be projected as harassment and eve teasing. Hyper active men and women should not start thrashing the man without knowing the facts of the matter. 

Parents and teachers should teach the boys that women always need to be respected. That eve teasing or any kind of violence against women is not acceptable in any situation. Similarly girls also need to be taught that these are serious issues and how to protect themselves against crimes directed at them. 

At the same time they need to be sensitized that they must never misuse the laws or the public opinion against these things for their benefit, because repeated acts of misuse dilute the gravity of these issues and slowly people might look with cynicism even at cases where women are rightly raising their voices. 

I have seen incidents where people believe that a 498A dowry harassment case had been made in bad faith, while they were actually genuine cases. The reason is that so many girls have misused this law in the past few years. If it is proved that the Rohtak incident was not a case of eve teasing, real perpetrators of such crimes may go scot free in the future. 

While we need to collectively speak against eve teasing and harassment of women in public places, we also need to ensure that innocent boys are not victimized. The aim should be for a society where women are respected and can move around freely without fear, where there is a high degree of equality and mutual respect between the two genders. 

It also needs to be understood that most men also support women in this cause and right thinking men are important partners towards achieving this equality at a much larger scale across India. Hence the collective anger of the society regarding crimes against women and the laws against them should not be targeted at men who do not deserve to be at the wrong end of the stick.
 

Sex before liberalization, economic and otherwise...

“Around 95% of the girls and 100% of the boys in Delhi lose their virginity in college”, announced a young team member confidently during the lunch time.

As the team manager, I overhear a lot of things from the younger folks and often pitch in with my comments as well, and this was an issue I had my views on so I asked,

“Tujhe kaise pata? How do you know?” I asked. 

“Pata chal jaata hai sirjee. If you are social and have a large circle of friends, you come to know eventually, about everyone.” 

Times have changed I thought, even though our health minister is against sex education, young girls and boys are pretty educated themselves, it seems. Post lunch while taking a walk around the company campus, I went into flashback, as to how sex was perceived when I was a kid and growing up in a small city in India.

It was during the late 1980s, I was around eight or nine. The greatest invention of those times, the Television, was making inroads into Indian homes and my dad also eventually saved enough to get one of those bulky CRT sets with shutters. It cost Rs. 4000 I remember.

We had some guests that day, so we all were sitting in the drawing room of our quarter in the defense estate we used to stay in, in Jabalpur. The lights went off, parents were still talking about daily mundane occurrences and the kids were running around the drawing room playfully.  

Suddenly the Television screeched loudly in Hindi, “Mala D, garbh nirodhak goliyan, mahilaon ke liye, Condom purushon ke liye!” Everyone stopped talking and realized that the lights were back.

 (In English the statement meant, “Use Mala D, contraceptive pills for women and condoms for men.” The ad was meant for population control.)

My mom looked at me sternly and ordered in Bengali, “Bhetore jao, go inside.” As if I had aired the Mala D ad on TV and probably consumed a few! I went into the bedroom thinking which of these words, “Mala D”, “Condom”, “Garbh” was the culprit.

This reaction from mom was not new though. Whenever Amitabh Bachhan or Rajesh Khanna came close to the lips of the heroine, or Shakti Kapoor or Ranjit struggled with the saree of a female, mom used to order us to go inside the bedroom.

Although before the heroes could really kiss, the director preferred to show two flowers doing foreplay in the rain and then out of nowhere the heroine used to have a baby. Shakti Kapoor always used to get beaten up black and blue, after pulling at the saree for 15 minutes. The hero used to break in through the door in a way that would put CID’s Daya to shame.

However these were scenes that mom used to think would spoil us and transform her good sons into bad boys and perverts.

“Baba sex mane kee?” I asked my father one day, as he looked at me in disbelief.

 But he tried his best. “Sex means, gender you know? Cow and Ox, Gander and Geese, Hen and Cock. Male and Female there are two sexes.”

“But why is it considered bad?” I counter questioned.

“Who said it is bad? Sex is good.” Baba concluded and left the room.

Well I agree now! ;) 

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It was in 5^th standard I remember, that a friend told me in school, “You know sex is the reason why kids are born. You have that one inside the pant you know from where we piss?”

I asked, “What?”

“Abey yaar jisse susu karte hain.” He clarified. I looked at him wide-eyed in disbelief.

He continued, “Girls do not have that, they have something different, I do not know exactly, but one of elder cousins told me. Then you put that inside the girl and the baby happens, everyone is born like that!”

“What!” I exclaimed. “What do you mean everyone is born like that, me too?”

“Yes yes dost” he was excited as he broke the secret, “Even your mom and dad did the same for you.”

“How dare you say such filthy things about my parents?” I said angrily and left the place before the poor guy could explain.

In the evening the gang from our defense estate got our heads together and we decided that this particular guy was an unscrupulous pervert and we needed to boycott him completely. For the next couple of years, this guy, who first told the biggest secret of life was completely ignored not only by me, but by my entire gang.

It was not a Biology lesson, but a humble Moral Science book, in the 7^th seventh standard that cleared the suspense. It clearly stated, “The male penis is inserted into the female vagina, sperm cells are released which fuse the female egg and kids are born!”

Bingo, so the pervert was right. I went up to him and apologized for castigating him, while he should have been felicitated for being the “first mover”. Pun Intended.  

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From the 8^th standard onwards, the learning curve on matters of sex was exponential for our entire group. Chastity, Debonair and the Sun magazines replaced Archies, Superman, Chacha Chaudhary and Billoo magazines. In those days Youtube, Whatsapp and the internet was unheard of, so the seminude models in these magazines came to our rescue.

Hiding these magazines in inexorable places in cupboards and under the pillows was a tough task indeed. One of my friends from the gang, Monty, got caught with some Debonair magazines in his schoolbag. The teacher caned him and made him stand outside the class. However he read the entire magazine himself in the staff room, excusing himself from the class.

The favourite section of another friend from the gang was not the pictures, but the Q&A in these magazines. “I had sex with my girlfriend and she is pregnant, what should I do now?” and so on. His passion was to read these out loudly in the cricket field after the match and then provide extremely innovative solutions, that are beyond the scope of this piece of writing!

It was from the cricket field that we were returning one day, when we saw a crowd around one of quarters near the cricket field. Nisha, a 10^th standard girl in the building had an affair with a boy from outside the estate. He often used to come and meet her at the terrace of the building.

One day a strict Bengali uncle saw them together. Those were the days where people considered neighbours’s kids as their own and no one in and around 100 square kilometers was supposed to have an affair. So the Bengali uncle tried to catch hold of the guy, who ran away pushing him aside.

He raised an alarm for a thief shouting “chor chor”. The guy escaped anyway, but the inmates of the entire building had gathered, much to the embarrassment of the girl and her family.

When our gang reached the “crime spot” the Bengali uncle was standing like Ajay Devgan of Singham and explaining why shouting “Chor Chor” was important to gather the crowd and maintain the culture and decency of the defense estate. 

I asked, “What has happened here, Kaku ekhane kee hoyechhe?” 

“No no, you are kids, you need not know” He spoke without looking at us. 

I asked again, “Tell us, what happened here?” 

“No no” he said again. 

I persevered, “Bolo na kaku ekhane kee hochhilo?” 

“Ekhaane laaaaabh hochhilo” he responded loudly with wide open eyes, pronouncing the 4 letter word in a distinct Bengali accent. “Love was happening out here!” 

Now “laabh” in Bengali as in Hindi, means profit or gain. 

So the mischievous Lucky asked, “Kisher laabh? What gain was happening here” 

“Laabh na, Laaaaabh…L-O-V-E laaabh, like it happens in the movies!” the uncle could not hold his anger back. So he probably meant, love was meant only for the movies.

That day onwards the family faced some social stigma for this incident. They quietly moved to another part of the city and we never saw them again. 

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Movies were not so readily available for viewing those days. People were dependent on the humble Doordarshan for their weekly dose and unless one was a movie connoisseur, one would rarely watch a new movie in a cinema hall.

However we in the estate were luckier. We had a Club where most of blockbusters would be screened in around four to five months from their release. And at times they aired English movies too.  

One of progressive club members of those times, dared to screen a movie that had quite a few scenes with frontal nudity and sex. The kids watched the afternoon show after school. The parents were angry. However all of them watched the evening show and then complained to the Club members that such movies were spoiling their children.

The Club never aired another movie like that again. However our gang was very happy that we were able to watch the movie and that was the point of discussion for a few weeks.  

Lucky had missed that one, so it was the goal of his life to watch an adult movie. Since that was not happening anytime soon, he used to imagine that he was watching an adult movie each time he went to watch one.

He went for the afternoon show of Agnisakhshi and then came running onto the cricket field in the evening and said, “Manisha Koirala ne sab dikha diya!”. I was never very hopeful of Hindi movies, given my experience with Rajesh Khanna’s kisses and Shakti Kapoor, but we all went with lots of expectations for the evening show at 8 PM.  

Obviously we were disappointed and we took on Lucky the next morning in school.  

“Kya dikhaya be? There was nothing!” I said.

“Ok where were you sitting?” he started explaining.

 

“How does it matter? I asked.

“See you should have sat on the seats towards the left end of the screen, from there if you bend a little and looked up, you would have seen a lot, believe me!”  

I somehow swallowed my anger. Later that day in the cricket field each guy from the gang kicked him repeatedly and simultaneously explained how the movie screen is two dimensional and his theory could not have worked.

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Finally in the 11^th standard, Lucky’s dreams came true when Monty’s parents went out of the city leaving the house, the TV and the VCR under his responsibility. We got in touch with the local “andawallah” who had “contacts” and got hold of the video of an adult movie.

That day in school, time did not seem to pass, by the evening everyone had gathered at Monty’s place, no cricket that day. Lucky was jumping around like a monkey in desperation when the VCR had problems starting. Finally when it started, there was pin drop silence.

Suddenly the doorbell rang. We panicked, the VCR was immediately switched off and the only available channel those days, the humble Doordarshan, came up. It was Monty’s neighbour, Uncle Pandey. He had come to enquire whether Monty was fine and had food.

He was surprised to see around 10 adolescent kids watching “Krishi Darshan” on Doordarshan, so attentively. When Monty’s parents returned, he had some explaining to do why all his friends were watching Krishi Darshan and how that helped our botany marks.  

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During Engineering first year, I met a guy Subhash, who watched adult movies every week in one of the cinema halls in the city, Delight, famous for such movies. He offered to take me for one. It seemed unethical to bunk classes and watch a movie, that too an adult one, however with lots of difficulty I gave my ethics a break.  

I was entering the hall with some nervous tension, while Subhash kept comforting me, “Load na le be, everyone comes here!”

Suddenly I saw a recognizable bald head. It was Madhav uncle, our next door neighbour! Both of us looked sheepishly at each other and disappeared on either sides of the cinema hall.

“Subhash big problem man, my next door neighbour saw me here. His son is my friend. ” I said extremely worried.

“He is married and has kids? Don’t worry, he is more worried than you, he would take this secret to his grave!” he started watching the movie intently.  

He was right. Madhav uncle never visited our home after that day and avoided me whenever we met. He smiled at me just once when he got transferred to another city. I feel sorry for him, he did not have Youtube in those days! 

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My parents got transferred to Kolkata during my second year of engineering and I stayed in a mess, with couple of nicer guys from my batch, one of them a guy from Kolkata extremely naïve and gullible on sexual matters.

While in the 8^th standard he asked one of his elder cousins the meaning of “Dharshan” which means rape in Bangla. His idiotic cousin only said that a girl may get pregnant if you do so. In school he learnt about friction which is “Gharshan” in Bangla, meaning two bodies rubbing against each other.

He confused the two words and inferred that a girl gets pregnant if a guy rubs against her body. With this fear, he did not board crowed buses and trains for around two years, for the fear of impregnating the ladies!

 

During the late nineties and early 2000s, Computers with gigabytes of memory had made their way into the rooms of almost all engineering students and so had movies of all kinds. Leaving the top colleges and certain geeky exceptions, I do not think any engineering student worth his salt, used his computer for anything much other than listening to music and watching movies and quite a bit of porn as well.  

Vicky in our engineering class was considered an expert in the latter. He always carried a hard drive that had around 20 GB of pornographic movies. These were segregated in folders as per the tastes of different people, “soft”, “hard” and so on. He was extremely serious and meticulous at this and valued his reputation as a provider of porn movies not only to our class, but across batches, seniors and juniors. 

Harsh, a day scholar in our class, had never watched an adult movie and hence he borrowed one from Vicky. Both his parents were working and all three of them, his parents and he had the keys to his house. He was hoping to use the afternoon after college to finish the movie off, before his parents came in and then return the CD the day after.

 
The next day he narrated his nightmare.  

His father was feeling sick, had taken the day off and was resting in the bedroom. Unaware Harsh started the porn movie in full volume in his room, and to his horror saw his father standing behind him. 

“Aise time par mouse bhi galat click hota be, window close nahi hota!” he explained in sorrow how he had to try four or five times to close the movie window.

He was contemplating moving to the college hostel and he would not be able to stay in his house with all that guilt, his father had given him a mouthful and his parents were not talking to him. Vicky tried to console him and explain that even his father would have watched porn sometime or the other.

Though not so serious, I had a similar situation with my dad, one night while on vacation, third year of engineering.

Zee MGM used to show unedited English movies before the I&B ministry raised a hue and cry, and I was waiting intently to “hit luck” with mom and dad asleep inside. Sharon stone was making love in Sliver, when dad suddenly appeared from behind saying, that he was not feeling sleepy and wanted to watch some TV.

 I immediately changed the channel saying, “These guys show all rubbish these days.”

Switched to Star Movies, Leonardo kissing a girl.

My mind raced quickly, National Georgraphic should be safe. The program was “Mating habits of big Cats” and a Lion and Lioness were mating.

“When you want them they don’t come and now they would be in bulk in every channel” I thought and gave the remote to dad, saying I was sleepy! 

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Married for 7 years now with my sweetheart from college, obviously I would now know about sex like anyone else. However thinking back, these instances seem funny and I laugh at them sometimes. On the issue of sex education, I feel obviously we have a cultural issue and one has to be restrained with kids, but this brouhaha over sex has to eventually go and we need to be able to speak about it more openly without shame.

Whether one agrees or not, the above was the situation of almost every teenager during the 80s and 90s, the confusion and growing up knowing things by hit and trial was fun at times, but it would have been better if at some point parents and teachers explained what actually sex means, that kissing scenes in movies was not really a big deal.

If there was sex education in school, we probably would not have boycotted that poor guy in the 5^th standard for speaking the truth, Lucky may not have been so desperate with Manisha Koirala and we probably would not have gathered that day at Monty’s place to “learn” about sex from an adult movie. Murmu could have easily taken crowded buses in secondary school and Vicky probably would not have maintained his 20 GB hard disk. Maybe Harsh’s father should have understood the situation and mentored him in a cool way.

Parents also would have to understand that whether they like it or not, every kid would eventually watch his share of porn in college. With sex education in high school, his learning over the subject would be balanced, else they would learn about sex from these unrealistic movies.

Worse they may not learn anything at all and may end up not having an as fulfilling married life, as they could. They may make huge mistakes because they would not know properly about sexually transmitted diseases, protected sex and unwanted pregnancy among other things.

Maybe a mixture of some of these reasons made Madhav uncle visit the Delight talkies to watch adult movies many years after marriage. Maybe it is not the case anymore, at least in the bigger cities, but girls like Nisha should not have been ostracized and made fun of for having an innocent teenage affair.

We need not be obsessed with sex and lose all self-control, but as we move into the next level of development for the nation, the hypocrisy and conservativeness around sexual issues and romantic relationships needs to be toned down for more mature, enlightened and responsible generations for the future.  

As I leave...

As I leave, 4 years older, these massive buildings would still there be,
Phones would still ring, headphones ask, what is the status, where are we?
Busy heads would still peep out, late in the night, to get the never ending work done,
There would be tough times, deadlines to fight, there would be frolic, there would be fun.

As I leave, submitting this laptop; its tired, spent more time with me, than my wife,
The projects, 9 hours a day that took, some weekends and sometimes all my life.
The ID card, duty strung around the neck, a minute of fame with the security guards,
The dreams I saw and could achieve and others that crumbled like a pack of cards.

As I leave, some may never meet, some maybe I will again see,
I know for a moment, many would think, old times and remember me.
Some for an hour, some a day, some relations for a life time,
Some I would meet in another walk of life, or maybe over a glass of wine.

As I leave, know that I will remember all, albeit maybe for different reasons,
I am extremely proud, of what we achieved, as great teams and across seasons.
Sans politics and sycophancy I did my job, by the might of my talent and work,
I am thankful to all, to those who helped and those who put up with my quirk!

As I leave, I would just like to say, it is possible to win and still be good,
One fine day, while looking back, at peace with oneself, a person should.
In this breakneck corporate world, goodwill and ethics may be lost like silt,
Projects get over, companies change, but not the legacy one has built.

As I leave, and the MOC shows, a status of "Presence Unknown",
Things do change and that's the way, we all have seen, all have grown,
In our busy lives, people are lost, when they leave and are gone,
So in life, both you and I would look ahead and just move on.

However should an old e-mail, or a memory, remind you of me,
Undeterred by intrigue, same beliefs, if you search, you will see,
That one is still around, ready to help, no regrets, or hint of sigh,
Holding old fort with dignity, smiling, with his head held high.

Never....

Never stop loving people, thinking you will be hurt again,
It is like not living life, taking death as the only gain.

Never rest on past laurels and think that you are done.
Success is an unending road and you have just begun.

Never believe you know enough and think, "now who cares"?
You have just collected shells, while the ocean of knowledge stares!

Never assume people like you and get your emotions soared.
You may just be an option, when they are really bored.

Never disturb people again, if they are indifferent to you.
The world is filled with awesome folks and brilliant things to do.

Never do all that law allows, and then have a lovely sleep.
Conscience is the biggest law, that could later make you weep.

Never forget the ones that care, while you make relations new,
At bad times, as fair weather friends leave, they will be there for you!

Never let old friendship's lights, estinguish slowly in your heart,
In the path of life, those lights would help, when darkness plays its part.

Never be too proud of your beauty, strength, wealth or power.
A storm in seconds, can take all away, with a mighty shower.

Never think, without you, the world wouldn't see the light of day,
Every graveyard is filled with people, who used to think that way!